The ups and downs

Leaving the safety net of the hospital was hard. My mind coming up with all these different things, as to what or how I will function on the outside. Things that you do on daily basis over sudden become a chore, a quest as to do them now with one hand. Forget dressing yourself in a pair of pants with a button and zipper, sweats it is. Opening jars, bags, bowls. Even trying to clean yourself or doing basic cleaning chores.

Thankfully my kids were able to come home and stay with me after I was released from the hospital to take care of things for 2 weeks and come up with some ideas on how to make it easier for me.

Friends and even ex-family members bringing meals and buying groceries and stocking my freezer so I only have to heat them up. Visiting to clean and help with simple things. Friends taking care of my dog while I am healing. So many people stepping up to coming to help me, that I will never know how to re-pay.

My first breakdown came the day coffee creamer spilled all on the floor and ran under the fridge as I was taking it out of the fridge and I could not mop it up, I was even trying to move the fridge with one hand to get to it. It was like my world just came to an end. And all I could do was lay down wet towels to soak it up as it came running out on the side. That was one of the worst days I had so far in realizing that things are not the same no more.

Relying on other people to take you places, no more driving, I know my friends don’t mind, but it drives me nuts.

Some days feeling good about yourself when you accomplish something on your own, and then there are the days where you feel helpless and curse like a sailor.  More to come….

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